Thursday, December 13, 2012

Comfortably Numb

Last night I did a quick Facebook check and a college friend had posted that he had just seen a good duo of Eddie Vedder and Roger Waters of Comfortably Numb. I asked what was going and he alerted me of the 12.12.12 Sandy Relief Concert and I quickly turned it on but had already missed the song. I hit record to enjoy the rest of the concert at a later date. 

As you know, Matt, was an Eddie Vedder fan so it obviously made me think of him. He would have loved this jam and would have loved this concert. As he was a fan of Palladia and Fuse, I am no stranger to the TV concert. One of the best presents I think I ever bought him was of a live Pearl Jam concert that he assured me was a rare find which I had no clue of when I bought. I quite enjoy TV concerts and I'll admit are a nice distraction from my normal squawky reality shows and make for some perfect background music. Matt would have known about this concert and had me watching it. I don't often find myself playing the "what would we be doing now" game nine months later but the game was playing me last night. I pictured us on the couch watching the concert surrounded by our Christmas decorations with Lila snuggled on her bed. 

Today, I pulled up the You Tube of the Comfortably Numb duo and quickly became entranced by the words. Lately, I have been thinking about how I have been seemingly doing better with this whole grief thing and finding the sunny side of life again. But I have also thought to myself... do you just at some point have to rise above it? I mean you simply can't live in that state of grief forever, it's just not possible. Do you have to stop thinking about it at some point to move forward. I haven't been crying as much lately (until today), I mean sure at any moment I could make myself cry if I thought about all this stuff but I don't so I don't cry. Have I become comfortably numb? 

Enjoy the video here...




  1. Melissa, I am very sorry for your loss. I know that you will find your strength and your own personal power through all this. I also believe that Matt is watching over you and cheering you on from the other side. I know we tend to search for answers that we just can't seem to understand. Some things in life just don't make sense. Instead of trying to figure things out logically, some things can only be felt/understood by the heart...and then sometimes those things can't be put into words, they're so deep and sometimes so subtle. But, once you connect deeper with your heart, your grief will subside and things will make a certain sense of their own. I know you will heal, but as with all wounds, there'll always be a scar. Namaste, dear!

  2. Keep on pushing through it girl. You are doing an amazing job and if you haven't heard it enough already, you are an inspiration.